Google Toilet Paper

Google is going to take over the world.

According to informed source that Google will release Google brand toilet paper to the market soon, which made in low cost, human and nature resource rich country Vietnam.

The toilet paper is made 100% virgin pulp, which I have no idea what does this mean. In the product description which translated into English, it says, just exactly like other Google's products:

"Super elastic, soft, smooth, strong, thoroughly absorbent, for you always!"

古诗改编大全

唧唧复唧唧，木兰生小鸡。
斩草不除根，春风吹又生。
春眠不觉晓，处处蚊子咬。
清水出芙蓉，蠢猪各不同。

忧劳可以兴国，闭目可以养神。
穷则独善其身，富则妻妾成群。

天生我材必有用，老鼠儿子会打洞。
两个黄鹂鸣翠柳，一行白鹭上西天。
座中泣下谁最多，哭哭啼啼真啰嗦。
两情若是长久时，该是两人成婚时。
待到山花烂漫时，我便奋力把花采。
西塞山前白鹭飞，东村河边黑龟爬。
良药苦口利于病，吸烟喝酒伤身体。

Johnson & Johnson

When you have an “I Hate My Job day”

[Even if you're retired, you sometimes have those days]

Try this out . . . .

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy

and go to the thermometer section and

purchase a rectal thermometer made

by Johnson & Johnson.

Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors,

draw the curtains and disconnect the phone

so you will not be disturbed.

Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair.

Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.

Now the fun part begins.

Take out the literature from the box and read it carefully.

You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

"Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested and then sanitized."

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times,' I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality control department at

Johnson & Johnson.'

HAVE A NICE DAY; AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ARSE THAN YOURS!

Now, back to your cubicle and do your great job!

iWant is the iPhone application all you need

Features list:

• Mint-fresh toilet deodoriser
• Art photo library
• 101 instant excuses
• Breathalyzer & yeehaa button
• Digital bum scratcher
• Fruit gums & jelly babies
• Personal fanfare
• Brrrrm brrrm button
• Toothpick dispenser
• Grunting sound
• Canned laughter
• Croaking frog sound
• Whooping sound
• Fast food maps
• Toilet paper end of roll warning